The Importance of Self Awareness
Kathryn Lee, MHC
According to Dr. Eurich’s research on self awareness, 95% of people identify themselves to be “self aware.” However, research shows that in reality just 10-15% of people actually are.
Self awareness is a term used and preached by many and while people may feel they have a firm understanding of what it is, they may have difficulty defining what self awareness is.
So what is self awareness? Self awareness is a sign of emotional maturity and intelligence; it allows us to see and understand who we are and how others perceive us. Self awareness allows us to have healthy relationships, separate our thoughts and emotions from who we are as individuals, gain perspective and cultivate empathy.
While individuals may want to believe that they are self aware, individuals may be afraid to look at themselves clearly or may be unwilling to put in the work to become more self aware. However, the reality is that a lack of self awareness will leak and stain every aspect of your life; it will impact all those around you, including your loved ones. Self awareness is crucial in not only leading a healthy life, but also in establishing and maintaining healthy relationships.
You may now be wondering, “So am I truly self aware? How will I know if I am or not?” If you’ve been asking yourself why does this always happen to me? Why do I attract these situations/people into my life? It may be time to sit with yourself and to look inward.
Some questions and thoughts to consider to assess your own level of self awareness:
Are you surrounding yourself with only people who agree with you?
Can you receive feedback? Do you become defensive when people do give you feedback?
Nothing is ever your fault.
It is hard for you to sit with discomfort and distract yourself.
You find yourself being easily triggered.
What to do to increase self awareness:
Journaling - Take the time to sit down and reflect on your thoughts and feelings. In your journaling, consider other perspectives and ask yourself what you could have done differently.
Seeking honest feedback - whether it be in the workplace or in your personal life, ask for feedback. Take the comments as areas of growth, rather than taking it personally.
Active Listening - Give your full attention to individuals who are speaking, be patient and give them the space to express their thoughts and feelings, paraphrase to make sure you are capturing what they are saying. There are so many ways to indicate to others that you are present and listening!
Acknowledge that you have blind spots and learn your triggers - this can be done by asking for feedback.
If you are working with a therapist, be honest with your therapist! And if you are not working with a therapist, therapy is a non-judgemental space for individuals to process and develop deeper insight into themselves.
Increasing your self awareness is an ongoing, difficult process. It can be uncomfortable to recognize parts of yourself that may not be positive and may be potentially harmful to yourself and others. It’s important to remember that we are all human! We all have made mistakes and will make mistakes. There is humility and grace in understanding that we are all developing, learning and growing together.