How to Uncover Your True Values

From the moment we are born, we are developing an internal value system that tells us what is good and bad, what we should or shouldn’t do, what is right and wrong. As we observe the values that our caretakers and community hold, we often begin to adopt parts of their value systems as our own. As we get older, many of us begin to recognize that some of our values may contradict or diverge from those that we grew up with. An important step in living authentically is determining what values are truly ours, and what we have simply taken from others. Here are some simple ways to begin the process of uncovering what your true values are. 

  1. List your values and assumptions

    The first step is to find out what values and assumptions you hold about the world, about others, and yourself. Take some time to reflect on these values and assumptions that you hold, and list them out. For example, you may realize that you’ve operated under the value that “work comes first.” 

  2. Reflect on your values

    Once you have your list, you may find yourself reacting strongly to some of your values. Starting with those you react strongly to, reflect on each value. Does your intuition tell you this feels right, or that it feels disconnected from yourself? Is this in accordance with your higher self, or does it sound like something you picked up from someone else? Take time to meditate and journal during this process to maintain a strong connection with your intuition. 

  3. Replace values that don’t serve you

    Once you’ve identified what values do not align with your authentic self, reflect on what does align for you. For example, if the value “work comes first” does not align with you, what does? When you envision the highest form of yourself, what do you prioritize? What role does work play in your life? During this process, consider how you can implement harmony and balance into your life. 

  4. Practice, practice, practice!

    Congratulations, you’ve parsed out what you truly value! Now comes the tough part - adopting these authentic values into the practice of your daily life. Identifying small, tangible steps to live by your true values can help you become closer to your authentic self. For example, you may decide to enroll in a painting class to move towards the value of “engaging creatively with the world”.