The Power of Rituals: Stepping stones to access and nourish the spirit
Sienna Chu, MHC
Spirituality can be quite an elusive topic. For some, it may be connected to a current spiritual practice or faith. For others, it may be associated with religious contexts and early childhood indoctrination. For a large handful, it feels distant and obscure, perhaps even irrelevant. Take a minute to notice what feelings come up for you when you consider your own spirituality. Do you believe in a spirit? If so, how do you acknowledge your spirit in your life?
No matter your background, I’ve found we all have a desire to connect to something greater than ourselves. Whether that’s feeling the smallness of our physical form on top of a mountain immersed in nature or gazing across at a city skyline in awe of the intricate buzzing of life. These experiences strike a chord inside of us, one that rings out “I am alive.” It allows us to see that we are both a part of and a part from something beyond just “I”. And, in that perspective, we’re then able to zoom out and distill down what really matters to us in this life. What are your top values? Love, community, harmony, kindness, health?
Not all of us have access to a mountain top or skyline view each time we want to connect to that part of ourselves, but we do have the ability to create and cultivate rituals!
Authors Emma Lowe and Lindsay Kellmer define rituals as “actions we repeat to feel and fuel our spirit.” The word spirit is derived from the Latin word spiritus, meaning “breath.” If the word spirit feels too abstract or is perhaps tainted from a previous religious experience, I invite you to consider your spirit as your “aliveness.” So, what are actions you take to feel and fuel your sense of aliveness?
What separates ritual from habit is intention. A morning commute can be experienced as a daily routine, or it can be ritualized with the simple intention to meditate on three things you’re grateful for. The beauty of ritual is that you don’t need a fancy set up, a temple or church, or anything other than your full presence. In fact, even the most ordinary moments can be the perfect stepping stone for creating a fulfilling ritual. Authors Emma Lowe and Lindsay Kellmer share that “the ritualization of the mundane invites the mind to settle into the body. It creates opportunities to get quiet, to feel honestly, to look inward in a world that is begging us to look elsewhere.” Rituals offer us the opportunity to reinstate our personal beliefs and values and make intentional our hopes for the present and future.
Take a moment to consider what aspects of your day could be ritualized. A great place to start is with the habits and routines you already have in place:
Meals: How do you normally begin a meal? What would it be like to thank and honor all the life and hands that helped grow and create your meal? How would it feel to intentionally eat slowly and imagine each bit of nourishment refueling your body and providing you with the energy to go about your day.
Consider: Create your own version of saying “Grace.” It could be a moment of silence, saying a thankful rhyme, or even a sequence of gestures. And who says it has to be before a meal?
Commute: What do you normally do on commutes? Are you walking, driving, or taking the train? How can you use this time to make it more meaningful for you?
Consider: Use this time to identify what you’re grateful for, excited about, or even hoping for. It can be used to reflect on the day ahead or the day that just took place. Commute time is also our moment in between from where we just were and where we are going next. How can you better honor that transition?
Morning coffee/tea: Where do you normally have your morning cup? Is it on the go, at a table with breakfast, or sipped down in between getting ready? Do you make it at home or buy it from your corner bodega?
Consider: Use this time to gently wake up each of your senses with intention. Notice the smell of the coffee beans or tea leaves and how it changes in each phase of the brewing process. Listen for the sounds of steam, boiling water, droplets falling, or the lush flow of coffee pouring into your cup. Feel the cup or mug’s temperature and weight in your hands. Take in the textures and colors. Lastly, taste slowly. Allow yourself to enjoy the simple pleasure of drinking something delicious.
Other areas to ritualize: making your bed, getting dressed, washing dishes, even cleaning.
Now reflect on where in your day or week there’s opportunity to add a ritual from scratch, so to speak. What time of day feels more accessible for you to build in ritual? Morning, mid-day, before bed? What would you want the ritual to be about? What intention would you like it to reflect?
Consider these suggestions as building blocks that you can pick, choose, move around, or build upon.
Morning Meditation or yoga sequence: A personal favorite and practice of mine is to roll out my yoga mat the moment after I’ve made my morning coffee. I light candles and burn palo santos to set the mood and energy for the moment and begin by simply allowing myself to land on the mat. Finding my breath, I begin with a body scan, simply noticing how each part of me is feeling. When I feel ready (there’s no time limit or marker but instead intuition), I perform 3 rounds of kneeling sun salutation, each dedicated to something I am grateful for (sunshine, a new day, my body, my partnership, my family and friends etc). This sequence ends in child’s pose, where I will clasp my hands in prayer and ask the universe to guide me on my path and to move me towards love in all that I do. Sometimes, I end my ritual here. Other times, I’ll return to a seated position and reconnect to my breath, noticing any shifts in my bodily sensations. I often feel a deeper sense of calm, softness in my joints, and less resistance to being still.
Mid-day mindfulness walk: Alternate through each of the senses, focusing on just one sense for an extended amount of time to slow you down and fully bring you into the experience. You can also use this as a time to pray or check in with your emotional self, intentionally asking yourself how you feel and what you may need in that moment.
Evening Meditation and stretch: This is a wonderful time to reflect and restore. We tend to carry stress in our bodies, so setting aside time to offer relief to our muscles and joints gives them the opportunity to heal and restore to their natural form. While stress brings us into restriction, stretching encourages expansion. Meditating on a “safe place” is also a beautiful way to end the day and bring calm to our nervous system. In your mind’s eye, bring yourself to a place that inspires and connects you to your higher self. This can be a real place from experience or one built from the imagination.
Other tools/practices to sprinkle in: journaling, singing, listening to music, prayer, using tarot or oracle decks.
Whatever ritual resonates with you, ask yourself what you would need in order to cultivate this as a practice. Be sure to start with something manageable and accessible. See what environmental factors support the energy you need to enter that mindset. For me, this means my phone is away and out of sight. If it helps, build an altar, buy some top shelf incense, or even ask a loved one to join you. In such trying and isolating times, we could all use a small gateway into the beyond.